Widow for a Week

My first week of being a widow was filled with wonderful people. People from the emergency room and funeral home were patient and kind. One fact has amused our family. Cremation is a two-day process. The body is cremated the first day and cools down the second day. There was teasing about that.

When Shawn knew John was dead, she drove me up the mountain in their golf cart to see a wonderful sunset. I took a photo of her with the sky. She also spent the night in my house, knowing David would not be home until the next day.

This was very hard for Logan, it being one of the first deaths of someone he knew well. When he walked through John’s office, he picked up a train hat and asked if he could have it. Of course, I was pleased that he wanted it and asked him to pose with it.

On our anniversary, Sadie sent her picture. Dogs (and humans) know when people need comfort.

John $ went hiking to look for train tracks for his dad.

My brother Bob came to stay a few days, and he walked to the creek with me. I like having a selfie to prove we were there.

Bob likes to be helpful when he visits. I don’t have pictures of everything he did, but I was very pleased that he replaced a blind that had fallen apart in the guest room. He also installed a rain gauge that John and I had intended to put out.

Most important, since we’ll be having people here soon, he repaired the shower. The diverter failed so that water would not go through the shower head. When we couldn’t find an allen wrench, we called neighbor Bob. Seeing the photo, Lise said it was the Bob Squared Handyman Service.

Bob and Bob

Many people have called, written, or walked with me. There must be hundreds who said they were praying for us. I never realized how much this would mean. Thank you to everyone who reached out to us. You made all the difference in the world.

69 thoughts on “Widow for a Week

  1. Anne, I am so very sorry for your loss. Words alone cannot express what you must be going through. May your precious memories be a blessing to you. Sending love and strength to you and your family at this difficult time.

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  2. I’m so very sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. It looks as if you have a wonderful support system. Isn’t it lovely that even the smallest things can mean so much and give you comfort.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It’s really great to see your beautiful smile. And the beautiful people right there for you. I admire your focus on the positivity in the hard times.

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    1. I’ve struggled with some of the formalities, like starting the accident report and setting up an appointment with Social Security. ALL of the office workers have been patient and kind. ALL expressed condolences.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. The hat looks great on him. Prayers continue for a good while. This emotional is so beautiful and heart _filing.and powerful testimony. Good help to you your brother. I love 🌇 photo. Beautiful photo with brother. Nice photography.
      God bless you! I pray to God 🙏!

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  4. Continuing to think of you and hold you in prayer. I shared your anniversary post with Donna. Not sure if she follows your posts or not. I will send her this one too. Thank you for sharing your week and pictures.

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  5. Anne, I didn’t know.  Typical of me to not be paying attention, and missing something important, and then responding with a wisecrack.  I didn’t know John, of course, but I have long felt that I know you, and I regret not being there when it counted.   But then friendship always counts, and I do count you as one of my friends.  

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    1. You are a wonderful friend, and I value you greatly. Honestly, I don’t remember your saying anything amiss. I threw people off by posting a picture from our wedding day. I know what I should have done. I should have crossed John out with a big X!

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      1. When Bob died twenty odd years ago, we buried his ashes under a little Buckeye Tree donated by a landscaper friend. The tree is now a hundred feet or so high. A year or so ago when some heavy equipment was used to dig up the septic system from the house, I felt it necessary to go flying out to the site, flag down the operator, and say “make sure you’re careful digging around here, my husband is buried there, so be respectful.” Well, the workers’ eyes grew as big as saucers…and looked at me like I was insane. Then I assured them that we had obtained the proper and legal paperwork for the burial of the box of ashes long ago. They did respect my wishes, though, and worked carefully around the tree. The Buckeye Tree is the official Ohio State Tree, and Bob always admired the variety. He always said that when the time came “dig a hole and plant a tree on top of me.” And so we did… 😉

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          1. You are among the small handful of people outside my immediate family that know about Pop’s Tree, as it is known. He always said that “When I did dig a hole and put me in it, then plant a tree on top of me.” I think that most people think I’m whacko anyway. 😉

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  6. So sorry to hear this. You sound like a tower of strength to the rest of the family, Anne but do take time to care for yourself and process your own grief.
    Hugs from down under

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  7. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts and photos from this past week. I like the idea of Bob Squared Handyman Service. Made me smile, as I’m sure it did you, too.

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  8. Oh Anne….my heart hurts for you! I have not been keeping up and when I read this it just brings so many emotions. I will never forget the visit we had from you and John when you detoured past here on your way home. I am praying for you and your family. You and John have touched so many lives in the best possible way. Whenever Lar and I see a train we mention John.

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    1. We loved seeing you in your home. What fun that was! Thank you very much for your prayers. It is what has kept me grounded this past week. I laughed when I read that you and Lar think of John when you see a train. That is a natural pairing.

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  9. Dear Anne; Mary Agnes and I are so sorry to hear of your loss. We are better for having spent one short hour together on your trip north a few years ago. More than a blogging acquaintance, we consider you friends. John and I emailed often, he with his laughs from different media, me with train articles when ever I came across something I thought he might appreciate. You have so many memories, from years in NY, England and the ever constant trips to the creek. There is peace in the valley, Love in your heart and I am a rewarded person for having known John. To you and all the family our heartfelt condolences. Lee & Mary Agnes Fiddler

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  10. My apologies for being so tardy reading this post Anne. I am exactly one week behind here. It seems inconceivable that it is already two weeks since John’s passing … I’m glad you’ve kept busy and time has not hung heavy on your hands, giving rise to sad thoughts. You have a wonderful ring of family, friends and e-friends as well to keep your spirits buoyed and you have a wonderful spirit as you move forward.

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  11. Anne, I am saddened to hear of your husband’s passing. You have always had kind words to say on my blog so I want to let you know that I am sending you a virtual hug and saying prayers for you and your late husband. I consider us almost family so I hope you have plenty of yours around you now. Please reach out if there is something you need – even a friend who listens and understands. Be well. May John rest in peace. oxox

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    1. Thank you for your loving support. Things are going well, and I still have family with me. After the memorial service, there were about 40 relatives having dinner at our house. Today we’ll h ave a neighborhood block party which will be on our porch if it rains. Danish daughter is staying for another month.

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